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Feeding The Flowers

by Ben Roque

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1.
Chandelier 04:03
Take off what you'll say and close the door a burning window shows the little world that came rushing in chandelier like a tear drops on the audience saw headlines hide your face and a failed saint hits the ground with all memories erased it's a likely place we are it's a simple place to go, where everything shows and here we are You wear houses of costumes in a naked room I get the feeling I'm made up when you look at me it feels like surgery someone else is under your tombstone felt the daylight you let inside me, the sky's raining down glass teeth but what do you sound like when there's no one to be it's a likely place we are it's a simple place to go, where everything shows and here we are
2.
New England 03:50
There must have been something there nobody runs from nothing the poison orchids appear the silhouette found you there dreaming your own weather the lightning dance on your head suddenly an ocean sets there still floats that evidence I'm standing on a barbed wire fence You assume undertones of New England in my bones and nail my past to my eye a mannequin on the line disembodied words you define buried life back in time You're cynical of the sunrise staining glass reveals your mind the only world is hard to find The faces fade inside your name got it all, and got away
3.
Just open up and leave yourself buried beneath how you seem She's dancing on the grave, but the way out has nothing to say about this place at all She's crossing out the eyes of a parody in life's disguise Don't you realize dead eyed character smiles in spite of his lines kept alive And I don't have a say, I just don't have to save a thing Now my body is free from me What's gotten into you? Is the world that you leak somewhere new You don't know where you've been, passing through someone's barbed wire friend who's been waiting for you You've been saving your days for the one you became to her Now my body is free from me You've been hiding in me while I'm opening up to you Now my body is free from me
4.
Broken Clock 04:01
The ceiling fan took off my head the queen of hearts drew my name out of a dream one more past the 12th floor and how will I know when the sky's an open door? there's no sign of life in heaven the one that's surrounding me she don't say a thing and I fear that I know what she means love's not the only thing we have here but there's nothing more for us to share so where can you go to be alone and inseparable? you say for once we'll make it home the broken clock will snap its jaw back where we're caught I'm saving the rain to bottle up in the grave flowers rot above me the love that's got into me she don't mean a thing
5.
Closing remarks are trampled with applause war is at my door the word’s intent to hack up a meaning no one there was sure the days all dawn on accident and a guess is as good as the world listen up and tell yourself the arrow in the air won’t fall on you because you didn’t put it there panic and reach for nerves shrouded and vague lying across the tracks one mind defined by plastic procedures and there’s no going back said you don’t recognize your own life underneath this light it sickens me you tell yourself the arrow in the air won’t fall on you because you didn’t put it there somehow the lights have all gone from the sky I just need one to sweep up by silence alone will keep us up all night all is by your side all is by your side passing by your side
6.
So you're the one, she says solemn and grave she got your canvas in hand with the flame melted paint leaves you standing in the frame Maybe the one you want buried your name in all the places you haunt in the rain dying word in the air too scared to breathe So you're the fuse burning the view endless and used it's the truth turning circles on the loose you're nothin new Figures that all you know is what she stole She shot the ground where you stood full of holes burn your clothes to be sure of your new role Funny you swear you got no place to go she took the road in your pocket lined in gold curtains up, let this character explode So you're the fuse burning the view endless and used it's the truth turning circles on the loose you're nothin new You never needed anything to burn down let your endless fuse just turn around long as you never wake up this town
7.
Roll that orange straight into hell you polish the peel from your nails red lips bloom when I look away “Who’s buried in the garden, feeding the flowers your name?” the part a piranha throws up give me back my skeleton one of us will eat the sky the other one won’t wonder why or lie a mask dissolves the face it’s upon to face me with fake amnesia who listens to a drunkard’s prayer? a ladder led you to some air where you’ll have to live with yourself the part a piranha throws up give me back my skeleton one of us will eat the sky the other one won’t wonder why or lie I’ll make you into nothing
8.
Say the Line 03:06
The lines that hold you here are tangled in the mirror I'm floating face down on the lake the glass is no mistake I'm fading the eyes are busted seams where no one is awake once I was a liar The sight is sore enough to keep a bad joke up explain that we all return to steam from icy coma dreams I'm sleeping beneath the crushing deep shipwrecked acting cheap once I was a liar spinning on a spire passing through the choir on a wire vulture eye machine breathing in the wall once I was a liar dancing on a wire passing through the choir birds circle the spire passing through the choir on a wire
9.
Scare 03:46
Slip off your shoes and let's walk home she danced along the country road between the holes of lightning bolts we’ll fill them up with rain and pepper wine and fireworks on the toothless skyline It’s impossible she says to me to fold the street into origami but the moon’s a lens projecting movies a silver screen will bury everything we’ll follow flowers up from the garden They’re lining up to lose their minds so long as they don’t know, they’ll be just fine the photograph’s alive in her eye we’re looking for a place to put in frame but nothing here has ever stayed the same

about

Folded into the midnight curtain of the High Sierras,
I lie next to a once-living pit of mellow orange coal
listening, as Cerro Gordo’s abandoned rail
disputes the notion of self.
There might be a piano,
or a dust filled pine box
buried just below where I sleep.
My clothes feel uninhabited —
as if I’ve dissolved beneath a mask.

The landscape is a map of collapsed pianos,
chasing a lit circular fuse like a firefly in a jar.
A whisper of wind through a broken windowpane
sighs, as if to briefly consider a quality of yearning
before becoming locked inside a clock broken at midnight.
I briefly consider dancing beneath arrows I shoot
at the melted stars, into the air —
after all, music is only manipulated air.
Chords & notes follow desert flowers up
from the centuries buried here.
With fake amnesia, this painted scenery faces me,
its condition sealed in perpetual transition;

There is a glimpse
of what these songs are about:

All things are in a constant state of becoming;
nothing is seen, heard, or felt the same way twice,
which begs the question:
Do words intend to hack up their own meaning?

Though I might always feel like I belong somewhere I’m not,
it’s from this restless, savage shadow that art emerges
into the certainty of pre-dawn light; like a conjuring.
It’s my job to get out of the way of whatever it is
I’ve invited here.

“Everything we see falls apart, vanishes. Nature is always the same, but nothing in her that appears to us, lasts. Our art must render the thrill of her permanence along with her elements, the appearance of all her changes. It must give us the taste of her eternity.” Paul Cezanne

November 22, 2016

credits

released November 29, 2016

All songs written, played and recorded by Ben Roque in Ithaca, NY, Philadelphia, PA, Essex Jct., VT, and San Diego, CA.
Recorded on a 6-track
Mastered by LANDR
2016

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about

Ben Roque Burlington, Vermont

Noir/Lo-fi influenced musician, author (The Midnight Cabaret, Calliope Steam, Living Paint), and collage artist.

Booking/All inquiries: ben.belldrive@gmail.com

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